Facts, Feedback & Filthy Narratives: What to Do When Things Don't Go to Plan

Have you ever launched something, hired someone, taken on a new customer, or stepped into a new opportunity—and it didn’t go the way you expected?

We have.

We recently finished our Heaven in Business conference in Dallas. And if you were in the room, you probably had no idea what was going on in our heads afterward.

There was a lot to celebrate. People encountered God. Business leaders found community and realized they weren’t alone. One man who came with his business partners decided he wanted to give his life to Jesus—something they had been praying for for more than ten years. Business owners sat around mastermind tables and walked away with practical answers to real challenges.

 There was a lot of good.

But some things didn’t meet our expectations.

Attendance was lower than we had hoped. Some elements of the venue and catering didn’t meet our standards. There were parts of our own delivery where we knew we could have done better.

And that’s where the battle starts.

Because there are facts, and then there are the filthy narratives we attach to the facts.

The fact might be: The food wasn’t good.

The filthy narrative becomes: We blew the whole event. I’m terrible at this. We should never do this again.

The fact might be: A customer decided not to continue.

The narrative becomes: Nobody values what we do.

The fact might be: That employee didn’t work out.

The narrative becomes: I’m terrible at hiring people.

Those are very different things.

So what do you do when reality doesn’t match your expectations?

1. Pause

Don’t immediately perform a full-scale autopsy.

When you’ve invested months into something, laid everything on the line, and you’re physically and emotionally exhausted, you are probably not in the best position to interpret what just happened.

Give yourself some space.

For us, that means about 48 hours.

This isn’t avoidance. If something urgent needs fixing, fix it. But don’t make sweeping judgments about yourself, your business, your team, or your future from an exhausted emotional low.

Pause. Let the dust settle. Then come back to the facts.

2. Find Wise Counsel

You don’t need flatterers telling you everything was amazing.

And you don’t need critics who throw a grenade into your world and walk away.

You need people who love you enough to tell you the truth—and stay around to help you clean up afterward.

Wise counselors can say:

“This was really good.”

And in the same conversation:

“You say this is your standard, and you didn’t meet it here.”

Ouch.

But that kind of feedback helps you grow.

Find seasoned, trusted people who can see both the strengths and the gaps clearly.

3. Put the Facts on Paper

A couple of days after Dallas, I sat down with my journal and drew two columns.

On the left: What went well?

On the right: What needs to improve?

In my head, the problems felt enormous.

On paper, the positive column kept growing. Names. Stories. Changed lives. Relationships. Encounters with God. Practical business breakthroughs.

The improvement column was real—but considerably shorter.

Writing it down exposed the filthy narrative.

This wasn’t about pretending the weaknesses didn’t exist. We are already making changes because of them.

It was about seeing reality accurately.

4. Ask What God Is Saying

Finally, go back to the bigger question.

What is God saying in this?

Were we faithful? Were we obedient? What is He showing us? What needs to change? What do we need to learn? And what accusation or shame do we simply need to refuse?

Everything you do will contain opportunities to celebrate and opportunities to improve.

Maturity is learning to hold both at the same time.

Celebrate what God did.

Own what you need to own.

Learn.

Adjust.

And keep going.

Save the Date: Heaven in Business Nashville — March 4–6, 2027.

We’re already applying what we learned and preparing for the next gathering. Save those dates now.

And if you’re not already receiving our Weekly Insights, subscribe so you’ll be the first to hear when Nashville registration opens—and receive practical encouragement each week for partnering with God in business.